Relationships, Sex and… athletes???

“I can’t wait until he knows he’s my son-in-law!” Mama D-Magic (from this point forward known as S-Spice)

Anyone who even sorta kinda knows me (especially through facebook) will tell you that I have a huge, major crush on Darren Sharper. I’m so not kidding. The man makes me all googly and even though I appreciate the art of crushing, it’s rare that I actually do it – so trust me, this is noteworthy. Because of this massive crush, there have been a couple random, but slightly entertaining things I’ve thought about concerning relationships, sex and athletes.

• As I noted, I have a huge crush on D. Sharper. It’s so bad that my family members know that when I speak about my “husband,” I’m speaking about him. In fact, my mom is attending the annual Bacchus Ball (as she does every year) this year and since Drew Brees is the King of Bacchus this year, most folks are assuming that other members of the Saints will be there. You know what my mom and I have been talking about lately? How cute of a picture I need to send her so she can show him her daughter at the ball LOL… seriously.  It’s gotten so bad that 2 family friends recently said something to my mom about Darren being so foine, and her response to both was that it was completely inappropriate for them to discuss her son-in-law in that manner in front of her. I love that she has taken this idea of claiming my relationship with this man to heart and all of this boils down to one important note – more moms need to be just as supportive lol.
• My sister and I have been debating since Christmas this very important topic: what you would rather date – a bench player or a super star? I say bench player (Sharper aside, of course), because I don’t think I’m equipped to deal with all the groupie love like say Kim Kardashian has with Reggie Bush. Remember, I can be kind of a possessive patty 🙂 She says that dating a bench player takes away most of the excitement of being with an athlete. She wants  to see him on TV and root him on while he’s knocking folks out on the football field or dunking on cats in the arena. I say we can tape his performance on the practice squad, watch that bad boy on the big screen in our living room and never know the difference! Is that wrong?
• I met a dude recently who was soooooo cute!, but he claimed to have had 79 partners, and while I called BS – even if that number is 1/2 of what he claims, the guy was 25! So if I believe he started having sex at 15 years, that means in 10 years – this man has had sex with at least 40 different women. Now, I’m not one to judge… but that’s a lot of damn women! And while my head and heart may be able to try and rationalize anyone having sex with that many people in a matter of 10 years, Lil Mermaid is not so forgiving. She does not want a penis that’s so unpicky! But here’s the thing – could you imagine what an athlete’s count would be? And then a superstar athlete?! ewwwww me and Lil Mermaid are queasy just thinking about it…
• My aunt called me during one of the snow events I was working recently (damn DC snow!!!!! grrrrr), because she had Willis McGahee on the phone to speak to me. I missed the call, of course.  When I found out what happened, my first reaction was – if you run into D. Sharper, call me over and over until I pick up the phone! Don’t get me wrong, McGahee is fine as hell, but he ain’t no damn Darren Sharper lol (shouts to Boss Brown!)
• A guy I met recently asked me if I had the opportunity one night to have sex with my number 2 celebrity athlete crush and then the very next night, had the opportunity to have sex with my number 1 celebrity athlete crush – if I took both opportunities, would I be considered a whore (based strictly on main society’s definition Cunty Black Woman – no shade here) because I had sex with 2 men in 48 hrs. My response, the hypothetical could never happen because a) I only have one celebrity athlete crush and 2) I wouldn’t settle for having a one night stand with that man… I want to MARRY him! But now I’m asking you all? Would you do it and would you feel like a groupie afterward, at least?

Anyway – those are my random athlete thoughts for the weekend. Any athlete crush you’d like to share???