Accidentally C-blocking Our Friends

13 11 2014


The other night I ended up at a bar with a bunch of girlfriends, talking girl talk, laughing, drinking whiskey, and giggling about boys.

Well as we looked around the bar, we realized there were several said boys in attendance as well. But, I noted, we were in far too large of a group of women for any of those guys to approach someone in the group.

“Yea you know the only guy who would do that is the kind of guy you wouldn’t want anyway,” one of the girls said.

“Right, because I mean, who wants to walk up to a group of like 6 girls and try to talk to just one of them? The odds are not in your favor.”


But really, why is that?

Wouldn’t you think if you have a table of single women who like dating and someone wants to ask one of those women on a date, everyone else would be down for the cause? Wouldn’t you think the other women would revert into wing women essentially? I would think so.

And yet, that’s not what happens in real life. We know this because there’s a reason men don’t tend to walk up to groups of women by themselves. Because far too often, they are instantly grilled, pulled a part, sized up, and judged before they even get out something beyond “hi.”

Thing is, we all know this. We all are completely aware of this phenomenon… and still the six of us sat at the bar/table giggling, not having anyone walk up to us, laughed about why, and didn’t do anything to change it.

It wasn’t until one of the girls walked away to go to the actual bar that she found herself being approached by a guy. And you know what he told her right? “I was hoping you would go do something on your own so I could talk to you.” Mmmmhmmmm. Theory confirmed.

So why do you think this happens? Why do we accidentally c-block our friends when we’re out? I’m not saying you should change the amount of people you meet up with, because that would just be crazy… but somewhere along the line, we’ve made it uncomfortable for men to do what we claim we want them to do just by hanging with our girlfriends. And if everyone is supposedly on the prowl, then aren’t we hustling backwards here?

What do you all think?




2 responses

16 11 2014

No one wants to be rejected in front of a large group of people. Because you know as soon as they start walking over we start mumbling, “Girl I know he’s not coming over here. Why does he walk like that? Why is he smiling so hard? He better be willing to buy our whole table drinks.” Usually the conversation goes like that.

I’ve never been in a massive group of girls like that. At most it was probably 4. But men have been ,ore likely to approach if it were only 3 of us. Usually they tried buying our whole table drinks which I always decline. And I stopped saying things to turn my friends away, normally I’ll encourage them and take a brisk walk to the restroom to give him time to make a move. All of the friends I have my age are all married or in a long term relationship. The ones that are at least 10-15 years older me are single and I encourage them to take a chance. But men have to be willing to take a chance at rejection. The worst that can happen is she says “no” and he’ll never have to see any of them again.

17 11 2014

That’s the thing! I don’t know why we women do that. Even if the guy approaching isn’t the one, right? You have to know that others are watching to see how he’s treated as well. And like I said, it just seems to be hustling backwards to me.

Actually, it’s been a while since I’ve been with that many women at a bar as well. Usually, if I’m in a big group, it’s mixed company. But this one just kind of happened accidentally lol.

I totally agree with you that men have to be willing to take a chance at rejection though. I just think we (as women) may need to look in the mirror and think about why they aren’t as willing to. I know I wouldn’t want to deal with that foolishness just to maybe, possibly get a yes lol

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