What Love Jones Taught Me (Part 2… kinda)

22 04 2014
love-jones-movie

Ahhh the 90’s… how they messed us up so much!

About a month and 1/2 ago, I found myself watching Love Jones again, this time with a good male friend of mine. Now, if you recall, I admitted some time ago that while I readily acknowledge Love Jones as quite possibly my favorite movie, watching it as an adult made me realize the twisted logic the movie had me thinking was right.

Well….

Here we go again.

Do you remember the scene where Darius poaches Nina’s home address off of the check she gave to the record store? And then proceeds to show up at her door, not only uninvited, but after she’d repeatedly told him she wasn’t interested in dating him? AND THEN proceeds to ask her out again and threaten to bring over Prince records every day of she doesn’t say yes?

Of course you do. If you’ve ever seen the movie, you know this scene. You may even, like me at 14, have thought it was super-romantic how persistent he was. How he just had to take her out at least once. How “he just knew.”

But ermmmm, can we talk real here for a second?

Like really real?

Because the truth is (and I’m sorry if this blows up your world Love Jones lovers), Darius was a straight up stalker. I mean, he showed up at her house! Uninvited! And got her address through illegal means (I didn’t look this up, but that has to be illegal right? Lawyers, weigh in please).  If a man did that to me today, I’d be calling the police on him. No question about it. And I certainly wouldn’t be letting him slide his stalkery behind into my place for further conversation (which Nina absolutely does).

So I’m watching this movie with my 30 year old eyes and wondering how the heck Darius is able to get away with this. And then it hit me — it’s because she was already interested in him. And when you’re already interested in someone, he or she can get away with things that a regular person wouldn’t be able to.

This happens in real life all the time. Ever complained to your friends how one guy or girl calls too damn much and then find yourself holding in a smile when the next person calls you four times a day? Or talked about how things like late night calls or early morning texts annoy the ish out of you until that person actually does them and all of sudden, you can’t get enough of it?

Mmmmmhmmm, then you’ve learned from the Nina school of thought as well. Some might call you a hypocrite, but I call it just human nature. When we like someone, crazy can seem cute. And when we don’t like someone, annoying can seem psycho. So don’t feel too bad; we’ve all kind of done this in some way. I just still wouldn’t recommend letting strangers who randomly show up at your place into your home, no matter how cute he or she is. That mess only goes well in the movies.

Have any of you ever found yourself changing your tune about something when a guy or girl you liked did it as opposed to someone else doing it? Please, do share.

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Hey, remember when I told y’all the blog would be back up with new posts last week? Yeah, so that obviously didn’t happen.  So very sorry. But…. I definitely missed y’all, and we’re back in business now. Hope you enjoyed your past weekend!

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4 responses

22 04 2014
29tolife

“When we like someone, crazy can seem cute. And when we don’t like someone, annoying can seem psycho.”

Basically, which means we are all crazy.

22 04 2014
dbaham

Ha! That’s exactly what it means lol…

Also, I’m thinking of doing a short blog series on my adult thoughts of Love Jones because I had sooo many watching it that night.

22 04 2014
Brenda

Love this! i was having this conversation the other day with hubs and he basically said the same thing. If the girl doesn’t like the guy, nothing he does is romantic. When I watched Love Jones a few weeks ago, I peeped how out of pocket Darius was for stealing her address but the outrage was lost in all the onscreen cuteness. However Nia Long was wrong too for dating his friend–but we never think about that part!! lol.
You should def do a blog series on Love Jones as an adult, I would love to read it.

23 04 2014
dbaham

I love that so many of us love Love Jones!! And your husband is absolutely correct lol. I had a guy do quite possibly do one of the top 5 sweetest things for my bday last year, and I knew I didn’t like him like I should because of the way I responded to it. I logically knew it was sweet and I was appreciative and humbled by it, but I didn’t swoon. I wasn’t giddy. It was just like… I mean, eh that was nice. Now had that had been “said guy who makes me smile,” I might have found a way to write 10 different posts about that moment hahaha SMH.

And yea, Nina was all kinds of wrong for going out with his boy, but I think I got that at 14. One of the things I didn’t get before was how dead wrong she was for testing Darius with that New York ish. I’m getting so excited about this series now!! 🙂

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