Tips for My Future Husband – #13

24 07 2013
Photo: rohan7things.wordpress.com

Photo: rohan7things.wordpress.com

Be interested in my writing.

I’m a writer. Always have been. Like literally, I’ve been better at communicating and expressing myself through writing for as long as I can probably remember.

In fact, one of my first memories I can remember without the help of pictures is me writing poems in a binder next to my dad as he wrote songs at his keyboard.

This love of writing would continue when I began working for the school paper and editing for the yearbook early into high school. I interned and wrote at the daily newspaper in New Orleans in high school, and came to DC understanding that I didn’t exactly know what I wanted to do with my life, but that writing would be involved.

My career has changed a few times, actually. I’ve been a newspaper journalist, someone who works in broadcast, a magazine writer, a freelancer, I’ve worked with web media, helped teenagers learn good writing skills through a magazine workshop, and worked in government communications. Definitely different paths there… but the main thing has always been my writing.

But writing isn’t just about my career. At my heart, I am a writer. I write in my spare time. I write when I volunteer for organizations. I’m working on a book. I write down thoughts when I can’t quite process them, and I definitely work through issues and problems in my writing. I write when I’m in a good mood. I write when I’m feeling giddy.

I may not know everything. But I am clearly a writer.

Now why have I said all of this?

Because you have to know just how passionate I am about writing to understand how upsetting it can be when the guy in my life doesn’t care enough to read any of it. This stuff is important to me. It’s not just something I do so I can get a byline. And as any writer will tell you, it’s certainly not something I do for the money. It’s in my soul. And because of how important it is to me, it’s also important that my future honey take an interest in it.

Don’t get me wrong. He doesn’t have to want to read this blog. I’ve actually gotten into a bit of a trouble sometimes when the guy I’m with reads it. But should he be interested in what I’m writing about? I would hope so.

I dated a guy once who was pursuing dreams of being a comedian while also thinking of getting back into running track. Every morning, he and I would talk to each other briefly and then say, “now go write” or “go run.” (And listen – I am soooo not a morning person, so this was big!) He cared about my book(s). He wanted to read almost everything I’d written (with the exception of this blog lol), and I gotta tell you – that ish was so encouraging!

Future hubby doesn’t have to emulate that guy. Clearly, we didn’t work out for a reason. But if he can be even half as interested in my passion as that, I’ll be a very very happy lady.

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10 responses

24 07 2013
bpcharles

Love this post because I agree with you that it is so important that your significant other take somewhat of an interest in your passions! If it truly is your passion, you don’t want to look over and see your bf/gf mid eye roll, thats so disheartening. I always get into faux arguments with hubby because he is always reading over my shoulder or secretly reading whatever I leave up on my computer when I’m not around. I act like I’m annoyed because “I’m sensitive about my ‘ish” and he likes to give me constructive feedback. But deep down I love that he “gets” that I love writing. But of course its a reciprocal thing so you have to support their passions as well, no matter how stupid. Lol, jk.

24 07 2013
dbaham

Thanks Brenda!!! And can I just say that I love when you agree with my “future husband” posts? It makes me feel like I might not be completely wrong on this whole marriage thing in the future lol

And haha, that’s too cute about you two. I’m like that too. I get nervous when the guy wants to read it, because I want him to loooove everything that I write, but then I’m also secretly loooving the fact that he’s interested. (Well, I guess it’s not a secret anymore haha.) And yes! Reciprocation is certainly key as well lol.

24 07 2013
bpcharles

LOL. Anyway I can help.

24 07 2013
dbaham

*SMILES*

24 07 2013
29tolife

Word. I always feel Sanaa Lathan’s character in Brown Sugar when her pro basketball boyfriend lied about reading her latest article, and when Taye Digg’s character tells her he’d sit on the park every Wednesday to read her column. I tell men I’ve seriously dated, you don’t have to read everything, but be acquainted with my ish.

24 07 2013
dbaham

Yesss! I remember those scenes vividly, and they spoke to my soul so much. Like, sir — what do you mean you didn’t read this important ass article I just wrote?! Unh uh. It is definitely time for you to see your way out lol

Also… totally stealing “but be acquainted with my ish.”

Annnnd now, “What are we celebrating? My divoooorce!!” is going to be in my head the rest of the day haha

25 07 2013
29tolife

Love that friggin movie. LOVE! I already know I’m going to see the Best Man Holiday in the theater multiple times. I am not ashamed.

25 07 2013
dbaham

Hahaha I just hope the sequel is as good as the first one! *crosses fingers*

25 07 2013
29tolife

Me too! I think everyone involved knows that the fans are not playing. I’m already loving the trailer. I think it will be good. They had like 12 years…

25 07 2013
dbaham

These are all true statements. Okay, you’ve convinced me! I was a little worried at first lol

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