Tips for My Future Husband – #5

22 08 2012

Photo: blog.tolunaquick.com

Must Read…. Something!!!

This is going to come off snobby, probably… but oh well, here it goes. I’m a writer. And while I don’t think it’s written somewhere that in order to be a good writer, you have to read – I think it’s one of those things everyone just kind of knows. So I read a lot. In fact, I just finished my 6th summer book on the plane this Monday morning (we won’t get into how that’s affected me actually working on my book this summer, but still – it shows you how much I like to read).

And I don’t just like to read books. I like to read magazines. I like to read those really long Altantic Review articles that span like 8 really long internet pages. I like to read about sports, politics, relationships, history, shopping… whatever. If it’s good writing or even if it’s just entertaining writing, I’m going to want to read it.

So while I know that not everyone likes to read as much as I do, it never really dawned on me that there would be people who don’t like to read at all. And that those people would actually brag about this fact.

I learned both in the airport Monday morning. As I waited to board my flight, book in hand, this nice guy came up to me and began to chat me up. He was cute and nice enough, so I didn’t bother pointing out to him that I was reading (and therefore busy) when he walked up. Things were going well until he asked me what I was reading. I told him about the book and casually asked, “what kind of books do you like to read?”

“Oh me.” he replied, quizzically. “Oh I hate reading. It literally makes me sick to my stomach.” “Oh,” I said. “Really?” I think at that point, he must have seen the strange expression on my face. Hard as a I try, everyone still says that my face always gives away my thoughts.

“Yeah, after college, I was done reading.”

“Oh, how long ago did you graduate,” I asked.

“Three years ago.”

“Oh………………………… OK.” This man hadn’t read anything in three years, y’all. I was done.

This whole interaction made me realize just how important it is to me that my future husband likes to read. And I don’t even care what he likes to read. But I just cannot fathom being married to someone who says, “I hate reading.” Errrrrr? What am I supposed to do with that?

I’m that girl who dreams about having a huge library in her house when she gets older – you know, one of those libraries that you need a rolling ladder to help you reach the top shelves. I’m that girl who brought her books with her everywhere she went at ten years old (including friend and family functions). I’m that girl whose parents told her that she couldn’t watch Martin’s You So Crazy, but it was okay because she was reading about the real Martin, and I’m that same girl who happily went upstairs and opened her biography book. I’m that girl who walked to class reading leisure books while in college, and who upon watching the recent Marley documentary on Vh1, promptly researched all the people in the documentary and made plans to borrow a friend’s Rita Marley penned book.

How can that woman marry someone who hates to read?

She can’t. And I won’t. So please, future Mr. D-magic… figure out something that you like to read before we meet. I’d hate to have to sing this song to you for encouragement later on in life.

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5 responses

22 08 2012
29tolife

You are not snobby! I agree completely. You have to read something! As a writer, if you are interested in me, you need to have googled something I’ve written without me telling you to and talk to me about what you thought of what you read. I’m exactly like Sid Shaw from “Brown Sugar” on that. I’ve also found that men with no college degree, who read often have a better chance with me than the man you just described saying he only read for school. I fell off the reading wagon, but I’m back on hard core. I’ve read about 5 books so far this summer too. Men who read for leisure are sexy and they will always have something new to talk about. That guy was a waste of cute. Oh well. On to the next…

22 08 2012
dbaham

Yesssssss “waste of cute”!!!!!! I love it! And thank you for feeling my pain. I totally agree with you, too. I’d much rather a guy who reads leisurely than a guy who graduated from college but hasn’t read anything since then. I mean, really – NOTHING has peaked your interest since then, sir? Nothing??

Also, I definitely expect the guy I’m dating to at least be interested in my writing. He may not have to read the blog consistently (I’ve found some guys aren’t exactly comfortable with it), but if you don’t know what I write about, what books I’m working on, and at least some of the topics that I’ve written on in the past, then that means you probably don’t know me. Because being a writer is a HUGE part of me being me.

22 08 2012
CJ

Yes reading is essential, at least read a newspaper or something. I don’t get people who don’t read either. You need multiple sources to form and opinion and reading is awesome! I plan on having a reading nook in my awesome apartment filled with books where me and my hubby just sip our tea and read the day away! That sounds perfect to me 🙂

22 08 2012
dbaham

Exactly, CJ! I really don’t understand it either. I mean, who brags about not being informed?? And your reading nook plans with your hubby sound absolutely amazing to me! You and your hubby can have your nook and sip tea in your awesome NYC apartment while me and my future hubby have our library and sip cafe au lait all day. Same thing! hahaha

3 10 2012
Tips for my Future Husband – #6 « Choices, Voices, and Sole

[…] the last installment of tips for my future husband, I talked about the fact that he needed to like reading, you know, […]

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