19 10 2011

For those who have never watched a Madea movie, you may not be aware of the “clank! clank!” motto. It’s really just a phrase that the main character says to other women when she is importing the all important wisdom of keeping your legs closed to married men. Now, you all know by now that I’m not that girl who believes you hold off a certain amount of time before sleeping with someone, but that it’s more important to listen to your gut when deciding if you want to give up the goodies.

Sidenote: Women’s intuition is a really powerful tool when used wisely. Well, honestly, when used at all. I contend that most times we as women get ourselves into trouble with men when we ignore our intuition, because we like the guy and want to will the situation into working.

So right, I’m not a 90 day wait kind of girl. However, that’s usually in a situation where you’re dating one guy and he’s hopefully just dating you. Thing is, we also know that that situation is rare. I always also contend that most people (guys and girls, alike) are never completely single when you meet them. Therefore, even if you’re dating that person, there’s at least one other person in his/her life you have to take note of when deciding about having sex with this person.

Now imagine if you are dating multiple people. And so is he. Well, you can see how this can easily become a sh*t show of epic proportions. Especially if everyone is just willy nilly chexing everyone they’re dating. Which brings me back to Madea. I know it’s hard to believe for my bourgie friends out there, but she’s been keeping me fairly sane these days. You see, I’ve recently found myself reminding myself to clank!clank! when it comes to these particular men.

And let me tell you, it hasn’t been easy. Besides the fact that I obviously find them attractive and sexy, my friends are of no help. I wouldn’t be surprised if some of them have started placing bets on how much longer I’m going to last. And sadly, even my daily romantic horoscope has joined in on the fun. While usually, I get messages saying something about having fun and meeting new people, this past week they seemed to have switched up the game a bit. To wit:

Don’t deny your physical needs right now. A little skin-to-skin contact could be right on! Flip through your little black book and call up that friend with privileges. What you do in your bedroom is your business, and even if you don’t go all the way, a great make-out session will do wonders for your attitude.


Talk, talk, talk. No wonder your level of intimacy with a certain someone is at an all-time low. You spend most of your time hiding behind a wall of words. Sometimes, the best opportunity for closeness lies in silence. Turn down the lights — and the sheets, too.

Really? Is this what the game is about now??? Hmph.

It’s already increasingly difficult enough not to think in terms of wanting to have chex when you are a chexual being and you like someone; I don’t need my daily messages putting more pressure on me. Yes, guys, what I’m saying is that you’re not the only ones who get a blue balls type of feeling. I’d like to have chex right now. I’d love to, in fact. But I’d rather not be having chex while dating multiple people.

Epic proportions, please meet sh*t show, remember?

So instead, I choose to clank! clank! What would you do?




One response

23 04 2017
Nicole Johnson

Women who have sex outside of marriage is crazy…I did it it does not profit you anything.

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