A few months ago, this conversation went down between yours truly and Pimp C:
D-Magic – So i’m going out with this guy tonight, but I don’t really know if it’s a date or if we’re just going to hang out as friends.
Pimp C – What do you mean, you don’t know?
D- I mean, I don’t know! We’re going out for dinner and drinks, but he’s a friendly guy so it could just be a continuation of the networking we did the other day when we met.
P- Really. (She said, sarcastically.)
D- Uh, yes, really. I mean, he never said, “Can I take you out on a date?”
P- No one says that! (rioutous laughter)
D- Really? Why the hell not; it would make things so much easier!
Yes, that conversation really happened and no, I still don’t know if what I went on was a date or not. And that’s not because it was bad or anything like that. On the contrary, it (whatever it was) was actually very nice. We laughed and talked for hours, almost as if we’d known each other for a while. And he picked up the bill. BUT, remember… he’s a nice and friendly guy and he’s also from the South, so really that might not have meant all that much. Plus, he high-fived me at the end of the night.
You read right.
So all signs pointed to, welllll… still a pretty confused D-magic. Of course, Pimp C and CCB were sure at this point. “It was definitely a date, fool,” they said. “No guy is that nice. And no one goes out for dinner and drinks to become friends – that’s either something you do with people who are already your friends or someone you’re dating.”
They had good points.
Still, I wasn’t quite convinced. And apparently, I’m not the only one who wouldn’t exactly call herself a dating expert. Marie Claire Magazine just recently published an article about a generation of women who don’t know how to date. If you’re wondering, yes, that generation is us.
But I honestly don’t think it’s that we don’t know how to date. Afterall, dating isn’t exactly rocket science, but between not wanting to be that girl that asks every guy, ‘so what are we doing,’ after a month of dating or folks not being clear with their intentions (and by clear, I mean asking you on a date, not to hang – even though the hanging seems very date-like), I can see how a girl could find herself asking – wait, was I really dating him or no?
It’s funny, because just recently a few of my girls and I were conversing and about 1/2 of the women present either had a qualifier for the person they were seeing or they weren’t quite sure if they were dating or just kickin’ it… maybe Marie Claire is on to something here. What do you guys think? Is dating something extremely obvious or have our typical dating practices cause a generation of women who don’t know where they stand?