The Answer you REALLY don’t want

14 04 2010

As women, we tend to be a curious lot. We want to know things about the guys we like. Sometimes we google them. Sometimes we see what we can find on facebook or twitter. And then there are some questions that we have to actually ask the guy if we want the answer.

But trust me when I tell you – there’s one question you should never ever ask, no matter how curious you might be. I learned the hard way, even though it was something I knew before. In fact, I’d made a point to never ask a guy – even if he asked me. I would always say to myself, D-Magic… you don’t really want to know the answer to that question. And so I didn’t ask… until this one guy. Blame it on competition because he got me to tell him my answer through trickery or blame it on my sick sick journalistic mind… but for whatever reason, the words came out before I could stop myself and the next thing I knew I’d asked “How many women have you had sex with?”

Now, I’ve had men ask me this question before (well they asked me about men, but you get the point) and while I’m apparently one of the few women who will honestly answer that question (I’m being sarcastic, but if you listen to guys… you’d think this is true) because I don’t regret anyone I’ve ever had sex with – I usually choose not to answer the question, mostly because I know that he doesn’t really want to know the answer to it.

The one guy I’ve actually told (the one I ended up asking later on) instantly proved my theory correct when he got abnormally quiet once I told him my answer. You see, while my number is nothing that would make Supahead or even Tyra Banks flinch, for that guy – to instantly know that he was no where near being my only… that stung.

And yet, there I was asking him what he’d asked me. You’d think by his earlier reaction, I would have known better. But nope. Oh but I soon found out that if you like the guy, no girl wants to know the answer to that question either. So there I was asking this guy how many sexual partners he’d had – and there he was telling me the answer.

And before he answered, I knew I didn’t want to know. Heck, as the question was coming out of my mouth – I knew I didn’t want to know. But after… after he answered – I knew I was right. And even though his number was pretty damn high by my standards – maybe by guy standards it wasn’t – but for me it kinda was, the thought of him being with anyone but me (even though I KNEW he’d been with plenty of girls aside from me) was more of the issue than anything (well and the fact that it was a LOT of anybodies but me lol). It was the difference between knowing something and KNOWING something. I wished I had kept it at the first one… and he knew that as well.

We quickly turned the course of the conversation, but the damage had been done. Forever – that number will stay in my mind. Forever, I will know just how random sex can be for him. And forever, I will never ask another man that one question again.




2 responses

2 06 2010
How to Avoid Sex – no, really… « Choices, Voices, and Sole

[…] think my propensity for word vomit is fairly well known if you’re a regular reader here. If you’re not, just know that I […]

24 06 2010
The List « Choices, Voices, and Sole

[…] of us have one. Yours may be one line long or 35 lines long – but unless you’re a virgin – you’ve got one. Yep, I’m talking about […]

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