Lil Wayne couldn’t be more poignant right now if he tried.
But while he was talking about specific men, I just mean men in general – actual platonic guy friends. Where did you all go? At one point, I had so many! I could talk to them about anything and everything under the sun. We would laugh, we would joke around, we’d clown each other, I’d get great sound guy advice from them, while giving out great sound girl advice to them. I could go to them about practically anything, and inevitably, they would be there – waiting to sound off in their own special guy ways. They were blunt and held no cut cards… and I appreciated it… and needed it.
And now…. there’s no one. I mean, really where did they all go?
I know what happened to some of them. I found out that some of them weren’t actually platonic friends after all. At some point, they tried to hit on me or take our relationship outside of the boundaries of friendship and when I made it clear I didn’t want that, we were never the same. Others (as with girls I’ve been friends with as well) just naturally drifted away… these things happen. Not everyone is meant to be a constant source for your life. And once you graduate from college and don’t see those people on a regular basis – it’s easy for the drifting process to occur. Others became boyfriends or lovers and even though some of those are still in my life, once you’ve crossed that line – the last thing you want to do is ask that person who used to kiss you for advice about the guy who kissed you last night.
But where did the other ones go? Where are y’all… I miss my dawgz, man!
No offense to my girls. I love them dearly. There’s nothing like talking to your girls… you can relate to stuff on a girly level, you have sixth senses about things and know where each other is coming from without even saying it sometimes. You know your girls. And that’s the problem – talking to them is like talking to yourself.
Which is why… sometimes, you need a man’s point of view. Sometimes you need a man who’s going to look you dead in your face and say – listen he’s just not that into you OR what the hell are you bs-ing for? Your girls are there to listen to you vent. Your boys are there to help with solutions. I am lost without my solution oriented folks. And the problem is that typically a woman’s last chance to cultivate real platonic friendships is in college. Welp, I’m about 5 years removed from undergrad (EEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!) and 3 years removed from grad school – so either I’m stuck or I have to start trolling college campuses asking dudes “Won’t you be… please won’t you be…. my neighbor?”
Do you see what you all have done to me? How cruel! How awful… ugh, man… I really miss dawgz.
* To note: there are some guys still in my life, but they’re either “big brother, we clown around and once I’ve settled on a guy I like, I’ll bring him around for approval” types or gay. Neither of those fit into the category. I just didn’t want them to think I was dissing their presence in my life – it’s real… but it ain’t this. Love y’all though!*
** This post was almost entitled “I really miss my homies…” but I figured that less people would get the 504 boys reference than the Lil Wayne one lol**