Ms GotSole if U Nasty

20 04 2009

See she makes her own money, pays her own bills
Always stays fly, keeps it so real
But behind closed doors she a nasty girl (yup)
Behind closed doors she a nasty girl
She got a crazy little figure, nice round ass
Walks so proper, talks with such class
But behind closed doors she a nasty girl (yup)
Behind closed doors she a nasty girl

~ Ludacris, Nasty Girl

It seems to be the consensus these days (and probably has been for awhile now) that men want an independent classy woman, but also someone who’s a freak in the bed. But what is it that they’re really saying?

While it sounds simple enough, I’m starting to wonder if the sentiments of Luda and all the other men who’ve made similar songs are a little off-center? professionalYes, we understand that everyone has sexual desires, so this is certainly not a diss to the song. What I’m more concerned about is the balance between the freaky girl that Gucci Mane claims he wants and the Independent Woman that Ne-yo talks about… and just as importantly, how do you as a woman know that you’ve met that specification?

Taking the belief that “perception is reality” as truth, how does a woman find this delicate balance? If she’s too much of a freak, there’s the possibility of being thought of as a slore and if she’s too much the other way, she’s called a prude or even worse, a stuck-up bitch. Cosmo would probably say something like, “as long as you’re a slore for your one man, then everything is okay.” Now, we can argue about how truthful this statement (made up or not lol) would be, but either way, it kinda misses the mark of balancing the two.

Let’s say I meet a guy and I really like him. If I’m trying to find this balance, does it dictate that I wait a certain amount of time before I have sex with him, but when we do, I put it on him like nobody’s business? Or does it mean that once we start having sex, I then have to wait some more time before putting it on him so again he doesnt think I’m a slore? I dont know about you, but this all seems a little too focused on the guy, no?

Where’s our song about what he needs to do? Maybe I want a man in the streets, but a freak in the bed too… but I feel like that’s not talked about as much. For as long as I can remember, the discussion of sexuality and its prevalence always focuses on the woman and how much she puts out there.

So what do you guys think? Is this balance necessary? And if so, what would be some ways that you would go about finding it or do you think it’s just something that comes naturally? And can some lady rapper come out wit a song for us girls… no, seriously.




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